It Seems I've Found The Road To No Where

For you to hold on to,
For you to belong to.

I'm sorry for mia-ing > :(
I have been really upset over the past few days, i'm really tired when people say i'm not good enough and i'm really tired about matters that keeps my happiness at bay. Recently, tests over the weeks, am tired enough. For the record, i have never imagined myself to be someone with such low resillience to move on. A dissapointment, will always be a dissapointment.

Moving on, just last week we had study skills after school on Tuesday. I believe when you're 16, you're absolutely sure that it's time to start studying, i doubt this workshop will give a kick to my studying habits. Yes, a queer i am. Wednesday after school, went to Holland to raid the whole of Cold Storage. Pushing 2 carts along tiny sideways, it was fun (: Miki, Swenn, Veron, Grace & I went to buy our Baking ingredients for that coming Saturday. The rest of the week was studying, and more studying. I tire myself so much that i fail to get to sleep peacefully every night. I have been dreaming of things so familiar but yet so foreign at the same time.

Saturday was rather fun, baking with the girls > :) Miki, Swenn, Veron, Jacq, Grace, Ben & Jerrell came over my place. We supposed to baked Cupcakes and Pineapple Tarts but rather, we forgot to add sugar to our cupcakes > :[ (*&^%$) Yes, rather upsetting. I was telling myself how stupid i was when Swenn asked me what 5 ounce was. We sat there fo 5 minutes, staring at each other in silence, just what is 5 ounces damnit?! However, the pineapple tarts were so overrated. But! Success it was, yes? The paste were equally cheapskate. But the dough were so yummy that i could stuff 50 of them into my mouth at one shot =p Tsk. Yes, self praise, it makes me really happy :] Beside the baking fanatic, we ordered Pizza from Saprinos and i pretty much enjoyed myself with my girlfriends, baking, laughing, eating and screaming > :) Pictures will be uploaded in the next post, thankyou. After our failure to bake a cupcake, went to SG to have dinner with Jerrell & Ben. Fun, long and tiring day with my squashed pineapple tarts and my "No sugar" cupcakes still left in the fridge. Care for some? I'll be delighted to bring them to school :D

Vday's coming really soon, i don't feel that it is as special anymore. It seems like another year on 14 feb where lovers meet up and exchange their sweet romantic love for each other. How sweet? Yes, that was &^%$# years ago since i felt like that. And yes, if i decide to have a bunny, i would like to name it Xiao Long Bao or maybe Snowball :] I remember the last time i had a rabbit, it died after one another > :( Tragic. Okay pointless entry =p

For the record, my exlim camera (bought just last year) is down for repair or maybe, i would have to get a new one. And, yes. Relief, my iPhone is going to work really soon and i can just throw this Nokia flip cellphone really soon!!! And yes, i am going to sell my "no scratches" PSP, i would like a pink DS now > :( Oh my goodness, how weird am i?

Insomnia, exhaustion?!

Ignorance is Bliss.

Yeh You And Me We Can Ride On A Star

How frail can life get?

On Sunday, i went to my oldest brother's church. To my surprise, it's entirely different from Yhope. It was fun and Bible Study is rather interesting, the people were filled with warm welcomes. But I'm not sure if I'm quite use to it yet, the teachings, sermons and praise & worship seems a little different from then. Went for lunch after church w/ my brother, his gf & their church friends. Cabbed home w/ Jacq, relatives came over with lots of fruits and we had dinner later that evening. Although i was troubled by many events that happened recently, my entire day was occupied w/ fun :)

Monday was a terrible, yet hurtful day for me. In the case of jealousy, i have learnt to accept the remarks people use against me. Such as, indirect jealousy? Thinking about it, it makes me laugh. Cause, why must i be bothered? Think again, i know where i stand and i definitely stand at a higher range then people who are still living in their own worlds, criticizing others. Yes, crying does help, it helps you to remove frustrations and painful thoughts away. I just want to thank all my friends that were my source of strength, encouraging and comforting me throughout the day after being hurt tremendously. And of course to thank God for teaching me to forgive others despite the pain. I'm over it now, really :) Forgive rather than carrying grudges.

Hello Baby :)

Fell really sick on Tuesday, had fever and really bad migraine. Went over to Dover for lunch with Swenn, Veronica, Theodore, Mervyn & Jerrell. Later on, cabbed to baby's place to rest and Merv tagged along. Wednesday, was extremely funnnn :] Baked with my Tutor after school at my place. We made Banana-Chocolate cake :D I love it.

Equipments & Ingredients

Bananas topped with lotsa flour

Mixed with Corn Oil & water

Cocoa Powder & Sugar

Chocolate bits

Pouring the mixture into the cup
Messy table, yes?
Chocolate-Banana mixture
Muffin Cup
Chocolate bits poured to the top

Mickey Mouse =p
Baking in the Oven
My Chocolate Banana Cake/Muffin
Spot the hidden Mickey :0

I want to try baking Pineapple tarts for CNY and Cupcakes for Valentines =p Somebody, teach me howwww :) Moving on, Thursday went to bb's place with Mervyn. Watched them play Tennis downstairs his place while i was eating Macs :] And did i forget to mention that my long, curly, beautifully permed, brownish nice hair is gone ): I went to Twist Salon for my hair-cut, extremely good and i shall stick to that Salon :P Yes, i know you people miss it cause everyone kept asking me why did i cut my hair short. So to keep the long story short and to answer all your questions, the reason is BECAUSE,

1. I'm tired of people asking me, "permed hair is allowed in school meh?
2. I'm tired of hearing, "aye, you didn't dye your hair properly, still can see your colour.
3. And, remember? I screwed my fringe and ponytail at some &$%#@*& bye salon.
4. I have been with really long hair for 7 years of my life, i counted :)
5. I wanted to try something new, cos my boyfriend agreed on me having short hair =p

I hope this will answer all ya'll questions (: Friday, went for Class Committee interview, it was a short one. GB with Hannah, Christina & Shreedhya, really funny. Drill was super tiring though. After GB, supposed to have dinner with baby, but, dad came to pick me up to have a walk at Botanic Gardens with my dogggggs & maid. Realize, Botanics ain't that bad, it's rather pretty! Amazing. I'm glad i finally took time off to spend time with my dogs, lovely! Yesterday, went to Vivo with baby, caught 27 Dresses. Really love that show, tickets were selling fast, so we had the FIRST row :[ Had dinner at Pasta Mania & shopped around with baby, finally i have some quality time with him this year :)

I need to get my Chinese New Year clothes this weeeeeeek :[ Shopping anyone?

Till I Get Flashed By The Paparazzi

As I recall, I know you love to show off
But I never thought that you would take it this far
What do I know? Flashing lights, lights
What do I know? Flashing lights, lights.

It's A Cold Hard Road When You Wake Up.

Someone quick, ask me how school has been? One thing's for sure, homework & revision is such a killer when you're turning 16. My time-table is such a pusher and i have not been sleeping well at all, despite the mid-night pouring rain. I just want to curl up next to somebody and just have a warm hot chocolate to last me for the night.

Just last Friday after school, had lunch w/ Hannah, Jacq, Yilin, Melanie, Miki, Veron & Grace at Dover, really had fun catching up with them (: There was CCA booths set up, but just so you know, i was not called to help. GB doesn't like me for sure ]: Right Grace? Went to PS w/ Hannah & Grace. Had lunch & picture this: (ahlians from centuries ago indirectly scolding some innocent looking secondary school girls who were happily having their lunch?) Funny isn't it? Went to some %&*#@! place to trim and layer my hair. And %$#@&! my bangs are seriously gross and my long beautiful hair was trimmed off thanks to that cheenahneh woman who kept nodding her spastic head. As a result, my hair cut was commented on a million times, tsk.

Moving on, Saturday went to SGS to collect some edusave award certificate & cheque(500 bucks) for excellent results, i was the only student w/ a yellow blouse and yes, i come from the north and study at the west, surprise? I had the most scrumptious dinner at the Mushroom Park (; Tasty soup & mushrooms w/ veggies, beef & chicken. Plus the really mouth-watering green tea jelly for dessert :] Tim & Jacq brought us there though.

Steamboat

Mushroom imported from Taiwan (:
Tea :]
Souppppp
Chicken/Beef
Riceeee Bread w/ condensed milk =p
Milk & greentea jellyyyy.

On Sunday, my relatives came over for tea and we had our dinner at Kooooonkee, some Chinese restaurant. Simple meal. PS: My hair is so black, I'm tired of hearing that my hair colour is so obvious -sobs.

Went to Baby's place on Monday(11th month w/ baby) & Wednesday after school, wanted to sleep badly :[ And guess what, I'm starting to show deep interest in Math =p Finally, i am able to take O-level F&N, although it's a lil rush, but I'll try to make the best of it. On Thursday, PE was seriously nuts, can you believe it, i completed 2.4 run, I'm fit okay. Took class photo during CC. After school, went to Macs for lunch w/ baby and went for dental, waited almost 2 hours just for being 10 minutes late, upsetting. Painful forces on my front teeth right now. I want painkillers!!!!!

Yesterday after school, went to Dover for lunch and later, had GB. They celebrated December/January birthdays and Farewell Party for one of the teacher. Drill was really tiring, I've not been this tortured for a long time. Cabbed home after GB, it was pouring. 20 bucks home for the very first time, I'm broke. Had Pizza for dinner w/ my sibs(: And PS: i'm cybered bullied -crys. Today stayed home to nap, Tennis is post-poned to next Saturday. Went to Thai Express for dinner w/ my family:

Thai Express.

And i just lost in the game of Rugas w/ my bro & his girlf ): Okay, i know i suck at these games. Okay, I'm gonna call baby now (: Adious!


Give me endless summer, Lord I feel the cold.

You Left Without A Goodbye

And I wish you weren't worth the wait
cause there are some things
that I'd like to say to you.

Now I could make this obvious and you,
you could deny me
all in one breath
you could shrug me off your shoulders..

Pretty Vodka Bottles

I'd like to fall into bed and go into such deep sleep right now.

This Solitary Moment

Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry
call I'm desperate for your voice
Listening to the song we used to sing
In the car, do you remember
Butterfly, Early Summer
It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet
Like when we would meet

First day of school was not what i actually expected, but friends exchanging "hellos" instead of "goodbyes" was something i appreciated & cherished. Like my title above, "I'm never good at goodbyes." I just bid goodbye to 2007 recently, and it truly hurts me to move on to a new year and not realizing what is in store for you. I will always remember the good & memorable times i had in 2007, it was truly amazing. I wished i could never mention goodbye to anyone ever, it scares me.

Moving on, to be frank, I'm quite happy with my teachers this year, it's a blessing to have wonderful teachers. Instead of those days in Primary School where you had to curse&swear on every teacher that teaches you. Well, i remember, i did. Senior year this year, it's time to be a big girl now. Being appointed class captain. Once again, i have to repeat to myself that i would not fail in taking up a responsibility again. Having failed in Secondary 1 &3. I reckon that attire check is troublesome enough, i do believe that ground rules should be set but not to the extreme. It's time to strive hard this year, i need to pull back my focus now and not be pre-occupied by other (distractions). I just want to mention, I'm pretty upset today. Some of you might understand why, I'm truly disappointed in you. Forgetting, it's not simple. Tomorrow will be a better day, i swear.

I took a lonely ride home, w/ a terrible heart broken.

So Long Sweet Summer

I don’t wanna hurt you
I don’t wanna make you sway
Like I know I’ve done before
I will not do it anymore
I’ve always been a dreamer
I’ve had my head among the clouds
Well now that I’m coming down
Won’t you be my solid ground?

HAPPYNEWYEAR 2008
New Year's Eve, dinner with my relatives at "Lao Pak Sa." Although the place is known for it's name, the food doesn't levels with the name, sadly, it didn't taste as goooood. I had like, fish&chips, chicken wings & satay :D After which, walked to my uncle's office which is extremely close to Esplanade. One thing for sure, Esplanade was PA-CKED. Went to the 22nd floor, they had xboxlive, flat-screens, pool table, table soccer, cafe, range of drinks (complementary), massage chair & pretty colourful comfortable couches. Over the period of waiting, i have merely become a coachpotato (reading mags, listening to my iPod & texing) It's actually, a coachpotato over the holiday =p

About 11pm, went to Fullerton Hotel to find Qiyun & his friends. It was so crowded that i was almost squashed like a bumble bee. Walked around & one thing's for sure, the fireworks were pretty amazing, star gazing. My shots were simply unprofessional, thankyou. Met daddy at SRC, his party was still going on. Counting down the start of something new is terrificcccccc :)

View from the topppp

Massage chair :]
Fireworks + snowspray
Lightly Sparked
Camera effect Pretty Ending
Table after celebration @ SRC
Dancing on the dance floor
Hype Dad
I'm partying like a rockstar :) Wonderwoman wannabeeeee :) Hype enough.

Yes yes, i know that is pretty unglam of me, many have said so :D Time flies, school's re-opening tomorrow & i'm dreading it badly. That jittery, excitement feeling of the holidays are all over now. Okay, i'm going back to review my book now.

Peace!